my refined interpretation of the word busy.

For the first time since arriving in Buenos Aires, I am finally busy. Kind of busy, anyway. No, I don’t have an alarm that wakes me up early in the morning to get a head-start on my days. I may even admit that I wake up between 9am-11am most days (generally closer to 9). If you’re getting ready to judge, just hang on a second while I spill my main excuse. The humidity has driven the mosquitoes out from their winter hibernation or wherever they go, and at night, they go in for blood, my blood, when my defenses are down. So, I wake up many nights frantically scratching and then can’t fall back asleep because the itching is unbearable. Eventually, I always decide to pull the covers up over my head and sleep inside of a little hot box, despite the high temperatures. Thermal discomfort, I guess, is more manageable than the prospect of more itching. For genetic reasons, I am a mosquito magnet. If vampires were real, I would probably be in real danger. Genetic reasons, really? Yes. I’ve seen the welts on my mom and both my sisters from mosquitoes in Wisconsin. Why just us, when there are plenty of people around virtually bite-free? An excellent example is Brandon. He has maybe been bitten 5 times since we’ve been here. Wtf. (Although, his allergies have been so awful that he takes some Argentine form of Benadryl many days, and ends up sleeping or miserable, so I don’t really want to harp on his mosquito “luck” . Btw, I know Benadryl is going to make a person drowsy, but I’ve taken this stuff, and I’m convinced there is something in there that are causing more intensity to these side effects. It’s quite an odd sensation). Anyway, because of this unbalance of bites from one person to the next, knowing my own family’s propensity for bites, I looked it up. Some people just have blood that is attractive to mosquitoes. I’m one of them. Where was I going with this again? Oh yeah, I wake up later than I should. Yet, I’m still claiming to be busy.

But this is exciting! I get up most days and write an article for my freelance writing job while eating  toast and having a couple mugs of hot tea. By then it’s noon or so, and I walk Luna for an hour. Sometimes we walk up Puerto Madero. At one spot along that walk, there is a fountain that Luna likes to jump into. Sometimes we walk laps around Parque Lezerma, just a block away. It’s a big, hilly park that is gorgeous, especially now with all the purple and pink blossoms on the trees, and tall palms scattered here and there. Ugh, this is not contributing to my case of: busy. I keep getting sidetracked.

Anyway, six out of seven days, I work on poetry. Whether it’s freewriting, revising, putting a solid poem together from various freewrites or from scratch, I’m working, and this is probably the most important thing to me right now. In addition to that, I’m also reading a lot of poetry, and prose, which is an essential part of my life as well as my writing. Included in the “reading” category is all the workshopping for the writing group and everything that Brandon sends me outside of that (hooray, Brandon is writing a lot too!). This helps keep my brain sharp as far as craft goes. By looking critically at other writers’ work, I’m able to hone my own craft much more effectively—that is, I can see my own work more clearly, and then my early drafts aren’t quite so rough. Plus, it makes me feel smart. Heheh.

So all that counts as busy, sure. But now I’m beginning to have something resembling a social life. Tomorrow night we’re going out with Guy and Paola (our roommates) to a restaurant/bar they love. Then Thursday night is the weekly meeting for the writing group. This week we’re meeting at 7pm instead of 8pm because afterward we’re all going to an art exhibit/party where Michael (one member of the group, a FANTASTIC artist) has a painting on display. Then Saturday night, Steve and Katie (Steve is my aunt’s friend’s nephew who works at the embassy here) invited us to a Chrismakkah potluck at their place. All these plans!

And I recently discovered that the art museum is free, every day! That, with the many, many other touristy things that are available for taking up whole days here, and I’m set for a few months at least.

This is what busy means. A more Argentinean than American definition.

I write for money

Back to the life of employment—although I must say, this work-from-home, telecommute business takes the cake as far as jobs go. For the first week, I was simply referring to myself as a freelance writer/blogger for an unnamed company, but the specificities of the job are what make it interesting. Plus, I already told my mom, who of course was wondering if she could read my articles. I told her she probably would rather not.

The most accurate way to describe what I do would be: I am a sex-blogger. I write blogs/articles/FAQs for an online company that sells sex toys and lingerie, and you know, that kind of stuff.  The purpose of it all is to sell sell sell, of course, so I have to promote their products within the articles. Recently, they also asked me what I would charge to also write product descriptions. Ha! Hot commodity, right here. Or something like that.

How the hell did I acquire this job? I scoured Craigslist’s telecommute writing jobs out of every big (ish) city in the United States. I applied to as many as I could, considering my skill set, and this is the first and only one that got back to me. I sent a sample article after snooping around their website, and after some vague responses from a company manager, it seemed iffy whether or not I would actually get paid, so I was reluctant to write more articles. But I did, because it doesn’t take that much time, and it’s not like I was overloaded with other opportunities. Once I sent that to the manager, payment options were discussed, (PayPal or issuing checks) and things were more solidified. Now I’ve begun to receive lists of assignments, and at twenty bucks a pop, I’m in business. If they’ll let me, I’ll write at least 5 of these a week (I doubt they want/need much more than that), and I’ll make enough money to keep the rest of my savings intact. Buenos Aires is kind of expensive for South America, but it’s still South America. One dollar equals four pesos. Maybe I’ll be able to go out to lunch once in awhile and not have to worry about spending the next week eating only bread and drinking water. Haha, just kidding. I will always drink wine with my bread.

The best part is, I get to do all of this from my laptop, at home. I wrote an article sitting out on the terrace the other day! Just a little FAQ on lubricants, in case you’re interested, all the while working on my tan. Lubes are one of the tamer topics I’ve covered, though. You don’t even want to know what an anal hook is. For that matter, neither do I, but I’m getting paid. And I get to throw the ball with Luna between paragraphs.

I haven’t used much, if any of this stuff, so I have to do a bunch of research. But it’s research—research is interesting. Understanding the psychology behind bondage toys and role-playing games is necessary when writing an article titled: The Finer Points of Spanking. I almost forgot to mention an essential component of my job. I have to write from the perspective of a pre-constructed character they’ve developed. At first I found this a bit stifling to my creativity, but as it turns out, this is much easier than coming up with my own fake persona. Easier equals faster equals more money. The style of writing is also really casual and colloquial. No sounding “too smart” or it will turn off readers/shoppers.

A grad school professor of mine said she’s glad to know my MFA in poetry is paying off.

I suppose it is.  Heheh.

**p.s.  Don’t you love my slightly tweaked blog deisgn? All credit goes to my resident digital design and layout expert, Brandon. He is the best.

Don't Worry, Just Work

Some words on Post-MFA-Life:

I spent a significant portion of the morning trying to figure out how to be a successful writer, long term. I mean, I want my poems, I want my books of poems to be published and liked by a lot of people. I love writing, and I don’t really know a better way to contribute myself to humanity. Ideally, and like almost every other person in my position, I would like to teach creative writing (or teach English, or whatever) at a college or university to support myself as a writer. I would probably also like being an editor of some kind, for a journal or even a company. The problem is, I don’t have much experience in anything besides writing (and a little editing), so where do I start?

In order to make the process less painless and time-consuming for myself (and others) in the future, I've compiled lots of information on searching for fellowships, teaching fellowships, paid residencies for young writers, contests that publish first books, contests that pay a lot for publishing a single poem, artists’ colonies with stipends, PhD programs in creative writing (I already have an MFA in Poetry), as well as a couple other options, so that when I'm actually doing the work and not just browsing, it'll be a one-stop shop.

Please note immediately: if you are unwilling to relocate, perhaps numerous times, this may not be the right path for you.

  

First, here is the link to the Poets & Writers page of Grants and Awards . This is where you will find a list of opportunities for paid fellowships, residencies with stipends, and contests that award anywhere from $500 to $5000 for publication of either a piece of work (like a poem, or a story, in a journal), or a whole book (including a first or second book). Many of these prizes are geared toward up-and-coming and/or young writers who have recently earned an MFA or PhD in creative writing. Certainly all of them carry some weight for winning the award, without considering the monetary value. This list includes what I consider to be one of the greatest honors for a writer to receive, the Wallace Stegner Fellowship from Stanford University. This one might be the most difficult to get, but don’t be discouraged. The list also includes things like the New Issues Poetry & Prose Contest  , and the seven month residency at the Fine Arts Work Center in Provincetown .  Poets & Writers also has another database of Conferences and Residencies. The list includes many opportunities that require you to pay tuition, but it is easy to narrow the list down to what you would like to search for. Here is a link to their database of Free Residencies . Also worth noting: many of the residencies require tuition, but fellowships/scholarships are usually available that can cover up to the full cost.

The Poetry Society of America also offers a list of Colonies, Conferences, & Festivals for writers. Much of this list is just for people who want to attend writerly events. If you are truly curious, though, there are some gems, like the Creative Writing Fellowship at Emory University.  This fellowship states the following requirements: MFA or PhD in the last five years, Creative Writing Teaching experience.  (I don’t have much experience teaching creative writing, but I have some. Once a week, I taught creative writing to high-schoolers for about a year and half). This states nothing explicitly about college-level experience. Here is another gem from the list, the George Bennett  Fellowship at the Phillps Exeter Academy, a boarding school. In fellowship qualifications, it states a preference for fiction writers, but they also accept poetry and nonfiction writers, based on quality of manuscript. Aside from that possible deterrent  (I am a poet), their one-year $13,000 stipend, not including room and board, is incentive enough to apply. All they ask is that you are a serious writer in the process of completing a manuscript for publication, and that you provide your “self and talents in an informal and unofficial way to students interested in writing” at this boarding school.  Another good one is Colgate University’s Olive B O’Conner Fellowship in Creative Writing . “Writers of poetry, fiction or nonfiction who have recently completed an MFA, MA, or PhD in creative writing, and who need a year to complete their first book, are encouraged to apply. The selected writer will spend the academic year at Colgate University in Hamilton, New York. The fellow will teach one creative writing course each semester and will give one public reading from a work in progress. The fellowship carries a stipend of $35,500 plus travel expenses, health and life insurance provided.”  WOW. I’m sure that one, as well as the others, are extremely difficult to get, but if you can afford the application fees and you think you are a great writer, then it makes sense to go for it. What can you lose?

The best way to find residencies from this list similar to the ones I’ve mentioned above is to look for the word residency or fellowship, ie (Stadler Fellowship). Many of the other opportunities listed here for writing programs require tuition.

With that said, there are a number of exceptions. For instance, the MacDowell Colony is an artists’ residency of up to eight weeks (in New Hampshire). There is no award or stipend, but they provide free room and board and offer financial assistance based on need, including assistance for travel expenses. Similarly, the Millay Colony for the Arts , located on the former property of poet Edna St. Vincent Millay in Austerlitz, New York, is free and provides room and board for one month between April and November.  Hedgebrook is another good one, located just outside of Seattle, although it’s only available to women. Keep in mind, of course, that free artists' colonies are quite competitive.

One other possible venue for writing opportunities is to search by state. Look for something like artist/writer opportunities in (name your state) and you should find something. Libraries often have writing and tutoring programs. Even the National Park Service has an Artists-In-Residence program that might be worth checking out (though it is listed under the volunteer category). Especially if you’re one of those people lacking in real-life experience in writing/teaching fields, consider this option.

As a recent graduate of Eastern Washington University’s MFA (poetry) program , my main focus is to succeed as a writer. I spent the summer living with my parents—I moved from Spokane, Washington after two wonderful years of masturbatory writer-dom, to Milwaukee, Wisconsin, where I slept in my old bedroom, worked at my old job, and felt bad about it, for three months. I did this in order to save for my move to Buenos Aires, where I am currently living. Before I say anything else, let me take some of that back. I loved spending the summer with my family, getting to know my siblings as adults, spending true, quality time with my parents (and watching them bond with my dog, treating her as no less a family member than myself, despite their previous, skeptical sentiments about dogs in general). I was actively involved in the writing community in Milwaukee, despite the short time I lived there. I was a regular at Milwaukee’s most famous weekly poetry open mic, where they even paid me with art and money to be their feature for one night. Imagine that, getting paid for reading original poetry for an hour! I also contributed to the website Poetic Milwaukee .  Besides all that, I just wrote a ton— some of the best poetry I’ve written so far.

It has increasingly become an option for recent graduates of MFA programs to teach overseas, especially for those of us who were not awarded assistantships, teaching English 101 to college freshmen,  including  free tuition and stipends. I was lucky that my particular MFA program offered other opportunities for teaching experience (Writers in the Community was not only good experience, but a fulfilling way to spend time).  But nothing is as good as real college teaching experience, especially with the job market like it is. Even my peers with the right experience have had  trouble finding jobs. If you’re up for it, look into teaching overseas, particularly in South Korea. I know several people (MFA graduates and others) who have done this. They make a lot of money and the teaching experience is invaluable. Most companies will pay for your travel costs with a signed one-year contract.

For my own reasons, including my dog (you know they eat dog in Korea), I moved to Argentina, which is not quite as lucrative as far as teaching goes. The jobs don’t pay well, if you can find one. And if you do find one, make sure you have TEFL certification, or are willing to forge it, or lie (these are valid possibilities). Unlike teaching in Korea, you probably won’t save money teaching anywhere in Latin America, because the pay is never very good. Arriving at the beginning of the Southern Hemisphere’s summer (like me) should also be avoided if you plan on teaching. I probably could find a low-paying teaching job if I wanted to, if I tried really hard, so don’t be completely discouraged by all that I’m saying.  For me, it just isn’t worth it. My main focus has to be writing (or else, wtf am I even doing), and working too much for too little money in South America just can’t be the way, not for me. Initially, I planned on staying in Buenos Aires to teach for at least a year. Now, I’m not going to teach, and I’m not going to stay for a year. Instead, I’m staying for the summer, and I’ll be heading back stateside in March (where I can make a substantial-enough living as an experienced server and apply for all those fellowships etc that I was talking about above). Instead, I’m primarily in Buenos Aires to work on my poetry, to work on my manuscript, seriously writing every day. This is certainly not a bad place to land as a writer. Every day, I find myself with lots of new material, written into prose blocks, waiting to be shaped/developed/whatever into poems. It’s incredible, really, what throwing yourself into truly unfamiliar territory will do to your brain.  I’ve even found a group of American writers who meet each Thursday to for workshops. To supplement my savings (I do have to pay rent and eat and live occasionally), telecommute freelance writing jobs will do. There are some online opportunities for tutoring that I’ve looked into, as well. At least online jobs pay in US dollars. Argentinean pesos don’t go very far, except if you want to live off of bread and wine (well, it wouldn’t be that bad…).

It might also be worthwhile for graduates of MFA programs to consider PhD programs, in Creative Writing, or anything else for that matter (Literature, Comparative Literature, etc.).  Here is a pretty good list of PhD programs in Creative Writing (thanks again, Seth Abramson, whose blogging also assisted in my research of MFA programs, back in the day).  An MFA is a terminal degree, so going for the PhD isn’t necessary to teach at the college level. That said, if you have the desire and commitment to expand your knowledge base in a massive way, which is what a PhD requires, then this might be a good option. This often includes things like proficiency in two foreign languages, or mastery of one, like at the University of Utah in Salt Lake City. From my limited research, it looks like many of the programs offer full funding, with teaching requirements (which I file under: Opportunity, or Experience).

Hope all this information helps. If you’re feeling discouraged, read Truth & Beauty by Ann Patchett.

At the very least, keep writing. A wise grad school professor of mine always used to say, Don’t worry, just work. I think he’s right.

**post-script: I also found this wonderful list of opportunities for writers.

this chill little country that i live in

I think I let myself feel defeated too quickly, too easily, for the first month in Buenos Aires. Psychologically speaking, this is normal, I know. Stress compounds other difficulties. Being unemployed and without a permanent place to live turned discovering missing items from the grocery store into an insurmountable crisis when it should have been a minor nuisance. While, I’ve always considered myself to be an open-minded, creative individual, I’ll admit I haven’t felt like one since I moved here. It’s not easy to realize that you’re not who you thought you were. Yes, I’m still open-minded and creative, but it takes so much more than that to live abroad in a developing country. So far, I haven’t been very accommodating to inconvenience, and in many ways that has put a damper on enjoying (noticing, even) the wonderful aspects of this country where I ‘m living, this gigantic, sprawling megacity.

Ever since I was fourteen, I’ve been employed. My first job as a dishwasher/busser at the restaurant where my dad was bartender/bar manager lasted for about a year and half. After that, I clerked at a local pharmacy near my house. And then I took a pay-cut and worked in the kitchen at a local natural food co-op, because I thought I was a hippie and that job was way cooler. Throughout high school, I also worked for my uncle at a coffee shop at the summer festivals, in addition to whichever other job I had at the time. When I turned 18, I began serving at the country club where my dad and sister were working. Throughout college, I kept that job, returning home for holidays and summers from the University of Minnesota. Of course, I also had a few jobs in Minneapolis, as well. Then transferring to Milwaukee for my last two years of school, I, once again, worked at the country club. I worked there until I moved to Spokane for Grad School. In Spokane, I found another serving job that lasted for the whole two years I lived there. And then I moved back to Milwaukee where I once again worked at the country club to save money before moving to Buenos Aires.

Now I’m in Buenos Aires, and I’m relatively unemployed.  Before the tangent about my work history, I mentioned that I was neglecting to enjoy Buenos Aires to the extent that it deserves to be enjoyed.  Well, let’s begin. No one here seems to look down on me for not working all the time, let alone being completely unemployed. When Brandon and I first came to look at this house where we’re now living, Sandra, one of the sisters who owns the house, didn’t seem to care whether or not we were working. Because of Luna, it seemed to me that Sandra would probably feel more comfortable if we were around the house, to look after her. Imagine a landlord who doesn’t care if you have job. Granted, Americans don’t usually move out of the country without some savings, but in the states, anyone would be hard-pressed to find a landlord who couldn’t care less about their employment status.

I’m thinking about this today, because last night I got into an uncomfortable Skype discussion with my dad about my job situation. Because of some wealthy, country-clubber he works for, he has the idea in his head that I can just walk into some company that has a location in Buenos Aires, and tell them “I know so-and-so” and they will give me a job. He says, I might as well try it, what have I got to lose? I know he is just trying to help, but I don’t want help, not from him, not from anyone. I don’t want anyone pressuring me to do things I don’t want to do. Last night was the second time he brought it up, and I know my father—he won’t quit until I do what he wants me to do. Ugh. Thank you, Argentinean culture for making me feel comfortable here, regardless of my employment status. Thank you, Argentina for finally relieving me from the workaholic atmosphere I’ve been surrounded by my entire life. It’s nice to have a break from that wrinkle-inducing, blood-pressure-raising lifestyle that is the standard in the United States.

With that said, I did find possibly unreliable employment, writing freelance blogs for a website to promote their products. They pay $20USD per blog, and would like me to write at least 10 blogs per month. It’s easy, and I can work from home. Of course, I’m still looking for other work, but for now, I’m happy to have found something. Now, hopefully, my dad will get off my case, and I can start enjoying the judgment-free living that I was too busy to notice before.

And now that I (kind of, maybe) have a job, as well as a secure residence, those insurmountable food crises I’d been experiencing truly have become the minor nuisances that they actually are. (This subject of missing food has even been incorporated into my recent poetry). Yes, I want a burrito, or some decent nachos that don’t have liquid cheese slathered across them. Yes, it is impossible to find tortillas or tortilla chips in the markets or grocery stores around here. True, I can’t have a real burrito like I remember it (so vividly…). But with a little patience and some (not much, in this case) creativity, it is possible to improvise some American-style Mexican food in the comfort of my own Buenos Aires home.

While there are no big, delicious tortillas, there is something similar: a product called Rapiditas. They’re small, round flour makeshift tortillas— albeit low-quality(they tend to fall apart), but I’m not complaining. Aside from sour cream, which I don't think can be found here, the rest of the ingredients that are used to make that burrito that exists so lavishly in my memory, I have finally located. I was in a state of hopelessness regarding my burrito fantasy when I thought black/pinto beans were only a product of the Northern hemisphere, but it turns out I was just looking for them in the wrong place. Black beans aren’t a canned-good here—they can only be found in the bulk area of the grocery store, or somewhere near the rice in a small market. I bet these are healthier than the canned ones anyway. Rapiditas+black beans+rice+corn+lettuce+tomato+guacamole+(ground beef, if I feel like it)=tacos!

Speaking of food, I want to talk about the delicious burgers Brandon and I made last night. Next time.

in case you wanted some info on air pollution and natural remedies.

After nearly a month in Buenos Aires, I can probably count the days on one hand that I haven’t been sick. Allergies, cold, allergies, cold, stomach cramps from unknown sources, allergies, cold. This is not normal. During an average year, I would guess that I am never sick for more than seven (nonconsecutive) days. In this estimate, I am not including allergic symptoms, but it’s hard to include those when my allergies have dwindled down so much in recent years. Even when they would appear, I always had a prescription medication nearby in my cabinet.

Why am I so sick here? Different allergens in the air that I’m not used to? Pollution? Poor, vitamin-deficient diet? Not enough REM sleep? These are all possibilities I’ve considered. This morning, I decided to peruse the world wide web in search of some answers. I was pleasantly surprised to discover that Buenos Aires is considered to be among the least polluted megacities. The list also includes other surprises like Los Angeles and Sao Paulo. (If you’re interested, here is the link. Look in “Air Pollution in Megacities”). As for Buenos Aires, the relatively flat terrain of the city coupled with its proximity to the Rio De La Plata produces moderate to vast air flow (hence the city's name), greatly reducing air pollution. Lucky for me, the summer experiences the majority of that wind.  While this is good news, it remains relative. Milwaukee, Minneapolis, Spokane, Alicante, all cities I’ve lived in for a period of time, don’t have nearly the air pollution of this city because they pale in comparison to BA’s size. Nothing I can do about this. It’s interesting to note,  but I’m looking for ways to be healthy again.

As far as my other hypotheses, of course the allergens are different. Only time can offer remedy to this situation.

My REM sleep is likely reduced as a result of frantic middle-of-the-night scratching episodes (the mosquitoes are taking over my body). This might be the most annoying of all the problems, but at least there are possible solutions. After a lot of research, it seems that many people think eating massive amount s of garlic is a natural mosquito repellent. As a supporter of home remedies and a lover of garlic, there is no harm in adding more of it to my diet. A number of others claim that vitamin b1 (found in asparagus, whole grain, pork, eggs, etc.) is also a natural mosquito repellent. Neither of these claims have any actual proof. Really, the only way to repel mosquitoes is to wear DEET and cover your skin (preferably with loose, light-colored clothing). Tell me something I didn’t already know. I guess I’m heading over to the chino to restock on citronella incense and buy some DEET.

What about my new Buenos Aires diet? I eat a lot of pasta with healthy tomato or olive oil sauces. I eat a lot of fried rice with veggies and eggs. I, of course, eat plenty of salad. More recently I’ve been drinking tea in the mornings.

*Just a quick aside: as a tea person, I can’t believe I’ve never owned a stove-top teapot in my life. Now that I’m living with a few of them, I’m awed with my previous ignorance on this subject.

So what can I do to be healthier? In response to learning about the possibility that b1 can repel mosquitoes, I asked Paola where I could purchase some vitamins. She looked puzzled. It turns out, many people in the world get their vitamins from a well-balanced diet. But then she remembered the gigantic bottle of US-bought multivitamins that someone left behind in the bathroom cabinet. What a relief. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to find some weird apothecary shop to sell me some vitamins that may or may not contain anything I need in them. In response to my recent lack of overall physical health, I’m opting for a balanced diet PLUS the vitamins. Aside from that, I’m going to the pharmacy today to find some Benadryl equivalent and standard allergy pills to help with my respiratory issues and mosquito bites (which cause an allergic reaction, after all). Hopefully, this will help.

1 cup = 240ml

i didn't move to buenos aires on a whim. i thought i had a plan, which only now do i realize was the rough draft of a plan. had i looked into it more, i would have discovered that the jobs for english teachers in buenos aires are plentiful (ish) from march to december, and then summer hits. the weather is hot and muggy and this is not the united states with its abundant air conditioning and overly ambitious attitude. the culture here is much more relaxed than the U.S., so when it is too hot to do anything, many people opt in the direction of not doing anything. i'm not saying this to place judgment on argentineans, despite the fact that it's caused my "plan" to unravel. if anything, i'm jealous. i want it all---the air conditioning AND the lax culture. but seriously, why am i saying it? i think it's because i'm starting to realize what a relief it is that the teaching jobs didn't fall into my lap.

i like buenos aires. i like experiencing the cultural differences and the language barrier and the architecture. i even like to see myself in the face of hardship. for so long i'd dreamed of living abroad, and now here i am, living abroad. the reality is that i already miss the united states, my home. i could list all the little and big aspects that i miss, but that feels tedious. instead, i will say that moving here was a great idea because i had to do it. if i didn't, then for the rest of my life, there would be an emptiness, a sense of regret about it. i like buenos aires, but i don't want to stay here forever. i don't even want to stay here for a year. in march, i have (mostly) decided that i will go back to the states, live in portland.
why this seems like a good idea: if i can't find a job, then i will be depleting my savings, and march is the cutoff before my savings aren't so low that i can't buy a plane ticket home and start a life somewhere (ie portland). even if i find a job, it will most likely be freelance writing on the internet. the pay is just ok and not reliable. (maybe i'd have money to travel!)i will likely have a workable manuscript ready to send out in applications for fellowships or maybe even for publication. i am confident in my ability to write a lot of quality work between now and march. the bonus is that i'll have missed winter, back in time for yet another summer.

of course moving back to the states with little money means that i will have to work as a server again. i've always made plenty of money as a server, and unless i stay at the same restaurant for too long, i don't hate it as much as i sometimes say i do. i will only be temporary, i hope. maybe by that time i'll be an expert at landing freelance writing gigs and i can supplement my income/resume with that work. aside from some casual thoughts of fellowships and PhD programs, that's as far as the new plan has gone.

471 uspallata

today's blog heading is my new address. cuatro siete uno oos-pa-ja-ta.

this morning i finished reading Year of the Flood on the lower terrace, in the sun.

i wrote a poem today that deserves attention, FINALLY. today marks the first day of my writing regimen. every day there will be time set aside for writing.

and this sunny afternoon, brandon and i walked to plaza dorrego---about 10 blocks from home, the main plaza of san telmo---where a small feria was happening, as it happens every saturday. the feria is market style, people bring their things to sell at stands, like jewelry, clothes, art, crafts, etc.. i bought two pairs of earrings, one cost 20 pesos, the other 15 (but she only actually charged me 10). i'm not sure why, but acquiring earrings, or perhaps all jewelry, makes me very happy.


i just looked up recipes for white wine pasta sauce, since i bought a liter of white wine (5 pesos) for cooking the other day. i'm very pleased with the recipe results i found.


and the best news of all: luna loves her new home.

trainwrecks/aftermath

yesterday, we moved to our new house in san telmo. it was fairly simple with our old landlady's help. she picked up the keys and called a flete to move us to our new location. I thought I would have to walk with luna while brandon went with the bags, but the driver was nice and let the three of us pile into the front with him. he didn't even mind luna drooling on his leg a bit (summer has kicked in full swing now, so it was quite warm). then we arrived at the house and saw our temporary room--our room is still occupied until sunday. no one was really around, and sandra handed us a contract and rules etc. this all felt a bit overwhelming, especially in our condition of dirty and hungry.
fastforward to our attempt at retrieving the money we owe for the room (first month's rent plus half for deposit). seems like it shouldn't be hard. go to atm, get money, bring it back. well first we tried to get it in dollars, since that was how the room was advertised. that was not working. you can't even get dollars downtown (and why should you be able to?). so then we started with pesos. after 8 atms at 8 banks, then talking to a couple bank employees, we were more than a little frustrated. i wanted to scream. i saw a beautiful map of buenos aires as we were walking and i said to brandon: i don't want one of those because i hate this city. i'm such a drama queen sometimes. i <3 maps. so, we finally went to a casa de cambios where a man in a suit behind a counter explained to us that in argentina, you can't withdraw more than 1000 pesos per day from the atm. that is roughly 250 USD and would not be sufficient, since we had to pay for our first month's rent and half that for the deposit. sunken, defeated, we began walking through the sunless buenos aires streets back to our new home. we didn't consult our little guia map of the city because we had walked around this area many times before. after around half an hour of walking, we noticed in our fallow states how unfamiliar things were looking. turns out, we'd been walking in the wrong direction. of course. forget about the beautiful, big new house were were now living in, the gorgeous neighborhood , the ease with which we transported our many things from one side of the city to another. we were stressed and melancholy as hell. we had to go tell sandra that we didn't have enough money to pay her, and on top of that, we had decided that we wanted to take the smaller room at this house because it is a bit cheaper, but changed our minds and now preferred the room which we were staying in until sunday and we were not sure how this info would be received.
lucky for us, sandra is wonderful. she said no problem, we can pay the rest tomorrow. also, no problem about the room, we can have it. no pasa nada. like that. then we made a beeline for the grocery store, bought some things for dinner and stocked up on beer and wine and came home to drink and unpack. still, we felt a little uncomfortable in the house. and what an awful day it had been. once we polished off a liter of stella and began unpacking, things didn't seem so terrible. but where were all the people in the house? where was there space for our things in the kitchen? we had met a few people briefly, but other than that, everyone seemed to be minding their own business.
then suddenly, there was a shift. this is the scene: brandon and i are in the kitchen chatting with paola (from peru) and guy (from effing madison, wisconsin). we're speaking spanglish, chatting it up while they explain the kitchen to us and chop veggies for a stir fry. not to mention, paola especially, but guy as well LOVE luna. they LOOOVE her. and they have forgotten to buy garlic, so we offer ours. and they say, well, why don't we just make enough for you guys too, and we'll invite matthew (from france, but i'm sure this is not how he spells it). and we bring in some bottles of wine, and now we're having a grand old time. the dinner was delicious and the company as well. and tonight, brandon and i will be making dinner. (then afterward going to a bday party--it's margaux's bday, a girl i'd been emailing with from the states because she lived in milwaukee to study awhile back). kind of a full evening. today, i will be getting my hair cut (FINALLY) because paola recommended a place around the corner to me, and said to ask for charlie.

the buenos aires apartment

after a strenuous, stressful apartment search that lasted for almost three weeks (as we verged on homelessness), brandon and i have found a place to live that looks and feels like it is going to be superb. contrary to my previous statements, we are not going to be living with an old woman and a shy middle-aged woman in a mediocre porteño neigborhood. instead, we will be living in san telmo, an area of buenos aires known for its narrow, cobblestone streets and beautiful, old architecture. san telmo is the oldest neighborhood of buenos aires and while for awhile it was a bit shady, in recent years, it has turned into a happening, flourishing place. there are lots of bohemian shops and little bars. the largest outdoor market happens every sunday in san telmo. it's cheaper than palermo, but not any less hip, if you ask me. and as for the house itself (yes HOUSE) it is owned by three sisters who rent out the five rooms to internationals looking for temporary residence. currently living there: american, french, and peruvian occupants. someone else was looking at a room today. and then brandon and myself will be taking one room. the house has a large, fully-stocked kitchen, two sunny and gorgeous terraces, one with a giant grill, a nice little patio that overlooks the tree-lined little street that extends from the living room. if you can't tell, i'm truly excited about this. i can't wait to live there (we move on thursday). not the best part of it all, but a nice perk, is that this room is the cheapest of everything we have looked at. how is it possible that our favorite place costs the least? well, sometimes everything happens to work out.

today was a perfect day. afterward we expertly grabbed the nearby subte (our new line, linea c) to a barrio called retiro where we ordered some disappointing nachos (liquid cheese, never again) and awesome beer. this place, buller pub, is one of the few brewpubs in town. we paid a little more than we usually would for an afternoon snack/beer, but we had reason to celebrate. what's more, our friend lukas, from germany, met us there and we had a nice time with him.
now, after an evening rendezvous at the dog park in palermo, luna is happy and calm, and soon we'll be making some dinner. i wish i could share with her my excitement about her soon-to-be living quarters. she will have a whole house to roam around in, including the terraces. she will love it.